BEDA Trois...Failed Adventures to Chi-town and Whining

The above is what I will totally audition for if I dont' get a ballet job next year.  Just kidding (sort of, but maybe not really).  Mostly, I just couldn't find a cute enough picture to put up there, so I thought a video of ridiculous ribbon dancing would suffice.  Hope you enjoyed that.

Anyway, I need interesting things to blog about.  Don't get me wrong...I know my life is, like, totally, like, the most exciting thing like, ever, but it'd be nice to blog about something other than my daily activities, which don't amount to much since I'm home and it's summer.  Ideas welcome in the comments, cupcakes.  Thanks in advance.  And I apologize for calling you all cupcakes :P

Today has been pretty ridiculous...not because I've done anything super exciting or noteworthy, but because of the awful morning I had.  I had planned to go into Chicago today to take ballet for the first time since getting back from Orlando, as I'm starting to feel fat, lazy, and out of shape again.  Anywho, my alarm woke me up at 5:30 this AM...and it was one of those things where the alarm was in my dream for a while before I realized it was my phone that was making that God-awful sound.  After hitting the snooze button as many times as I could without being late, I got up, took a shower, got ready, and headed out the door with what I thought was plenty of time to drive the 20 minutes to get to the train station and have 10 minutes to spare before my train left for Chicago...WRONG.  There were thunderstorms early this morning and the rain pretty much effed up traffic, and so, by the time I got to the train station, the train had pulled up, I hadn't parked, and I still needed to go inside to buy a ticket...which obviously wasn't happening before the train pulled away from the station and onwards to the Windy City.  Maddening. 

So I turned around home, drove home in a downpour, and went back to sleep for a while.  The rest of the day has been filled with me running errands, working out (man, I missed the Y), and unsuccessfully making progress on my independent study class.  I am not one of those people who can work without deadlines.  I need them to be productive.  Otherwise, I just let things sit and sit and sit and collect dust.  Which is kind of what has happened with this correspondence class I'm taking.  But, in my defense, it's this religious studies class I thought I would more or less breeze through and really enjoy called "Introduction to the New Testament."  I know, I know...boring.  And it is.  So dull.  And there's so much busy work, it makes me want to kill myself.  But there's nothing I can do about it...it's paid for and I'm committed, and without these three extra credits, I won't be able to graduate in May.  Anyone out there have any motivation they'd be willing to lend me?  It would be much appreciated.

I feel like my blog needs some sort of thing at the end a la Hayley's Chipotle burrito count, so I think I'm going to do "song I can't get out of my head."  Let me know in comments if you have something better or more exciting!  I'm really liking this BEDA thing.  Au revoir!  Love, me.

Song I currently can't get out of my head: "Forever" by Vertical Horizon (if you've never heard it, go listen! Now!)

BEDA Deux: Orlando Highlight Reel

Day 2. Oh dear, I have no idea how I'm going to be able to keep this up for the rest of the month, but I'm committed, so now I have no choice.

I feel really lazy today.  I was planning on going into Chicago this morning to take ballet and possibly modern, but it turns out that my mom's car is busted, so she stole mine to go to work, so I had no way of getting to the train station, which foiled my plan.  Upon learning this, I went back to sleep and didn't wake up til 11...which is absurd and should never happen again.  Nothing else exciting has happened today, so I guess I'll more fully recap my five weeks spent in Orlando:

Most of the RA girls at Universal City Walk

There were 12 RAs total and 1 "head RA," ranging in age from 18-25...I was the 2nd oldest at 22 and Brandon, our head RA was the oldest (that's most of us in the picture at the top--last night/no sleep/don't ask).  And I felt old most of the summer...being around a bunch of 15 year-old ballet prodigies will do that to you.  Anyway, we resided on University of Central Florida's Rosen College of Hospitality campus, which was small, but fairly brand new.  The apartment-style setup of the dorm was lovely, and there was plenty of space to move around, and there was a pool--which would have been awesome for the whole summer, except that a pump broke in the middle of week 2, and the university never got around to fixing it before we left (UGH!).  The only complaint I had with where we stayed was the food (it was just awful) and the lack of things to do around campus (seriously, the only things within walking distance were a Publix, chinese food restaurant, and pizza place across the street).

The dancing was good, but I won't go into too much detail about it because talking about it would probably bore you.  The days were long.  There were a lot of baby ballerina prodigies.  My body was totally shot by the end.  And I got into better shape than I've been in for a while.

At Downtown Disney for Cirque du Soleil's La Nouba (eating Wetzel's Pretzels) with Kendrick, Lauren, Kelli, and David

The weekend excursions on which we accompanied the kids were probably the most memorable part of the program.  I was fortunate enough to have been able to attend all four trips--Disney World's Magic Kingdom, Aquatica (Sea World's Water Park), Cirque du Soleil's La Nouba, and Universal's Islands of Adventure (aka THE WIZARDING WORLD OF HARRY POTTER).  I really don't have much to say except that it was all AMAZING and MAGICAL and AWESOME and INCREDIBLE and I'VE RUN OUT OF ADJECTIVES AND THOSE DON'T DO IT JUSTICE.  My family was not one of those families who went to Florida every year.  In fact, before this, the only two trips to Florida I'd taken were a visit to Ft. Lauderdale as a toddler of which I have no recollection and Virginia School of the Arts's 20 hour bus ride to Miami to spend four days at The National High School Dance Festival my senior year in 2006.  Needless to say, I'd never been to Disney World before this.  When I walked in and began walking down Main Street and got my first glimpse of Cinderella's castle, I started crying.  It was just so magical and wonderful and I was with my amazing RA friends and there was so much togetherness and loveliness and AHH!  Moving on...there's not much to say about Aquatica, as it was cloudy the day we went, and I hate waterparks, but whatever.  La Nouba was freaking awesome, as I've never seen Cirque live and there was a ballet dancer and it kind of got me thinking about the many options I have as a dancer, not just this closed-minded view of the ballet world.

In front of Cinderella's Castle...clearly more excited to be at Disney than most of the six-year-olds there

And then...(drumroll, please)...there was The Wizarding World!!!?!?!!!!!!  My friend Liz and I arrived at Universal and literally ran, as fast as we could, to the back of Islands of Adventure to get to the park.  And I started crying when I saw the gates of Hogsmeade.  It really was like my imagination had come to life right before my eyes.  And it was amazing because the park hadn't even been open for a month, and I was there.  And with people I loved.  True, it would have been even more epic to experience it for the first time with Infinitus goers at The Night of a Thousand Wizards, but it didn't matter because I. Was. At. Hogwarts.  There's really not much else to say...I started crying again while riding The Forbidden Journey-tears of absolute unadulterated joy.  I never thought I'd get to go, and here I was.

In front of the Hogwarts Express... "I will miss the train ride in..."

With my good RA friend Liz in front of Hogwarts Castle :D :D :D

Another awesome thing happened in Orlando.  As the program coincided with Infinitus, I was able to go to the Royal Pacific and hang out with some of my favorite people, if only for a few hours the night of the ball.  I spent the early evening swimming in the amazing pool with Marlena and Leah, and then hung around and waited for people to get ready for the ball.  While I didn't have a ticket and couldn't stay that long, my dear friend Adam had the brilliant idea of sneaking me in...and it worked, and I got to hang out for an hour or so, and see lots of awesome people.  I didn't want that night to end.  But, alas, it did and I returned to the land of bratty ballerina children.

From left to right: Adam, Marlena, Leah, and I at the Infinitus "Night of Frivolity" Ball...clearly I'm a little underdressed, but I didn't mind because I was with people that I love <3

Speaking of bratty ballerina children...I've literally never in my life seen kids this bratty, spoiled, or entitled.  I think it must be a generational thing because all of us RAs were just appalled at some of the things that went down.  It was as if these kids had never been told "NO" in their entire lives.  It also appeared as if they'd never had to do anything for themselves, including cleaning a bathroom or making a bed.  They felt they were owed everything by the RAs and sought to constantly bend the rules and see how far they could push our buttons.  It was outrageous and awful and I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY hope I was never like that as a 14-year-old.

One piece of not-so-great news...my grandfather passed away while I was in Orlando, forcing me to go home for a few days during the second week.  He was 88 and just a few days shy of his 89th birthday.  He had been battling cancer for several years, and it was peaceful and quiet.  It was hard to say goodbye, but I'm glad I returned home to do so.  You are missed, Grampa.

And so another day of BEDA comes to a close.  I'll try not to make my posts so long from here on out, but I felt like I needed to write about my experience in Orlando.  Happy blogging.  Love, me.

BEDA Un...The Beginning

Ok, so I wasn't going to commit to doing this, but my dear friends Sarah and Marlena are, so I thought it be good to join in the fun.  By the way, you should check out their blogs.  They are lovely writers and a whole lot better at this than I am.  So now I'm committed and can't back out and I have friends to motivate me to do this.  For those of you who don't know, BEDA stands for Blog Every Day in August, though I suppose it has been used for Blog Every Day in April, as well.  Aaaanyway, because I recently rediscovered that I have a blog, I think this will be good motivation for me to keep up with it. 

Here goes...OMG it's August!?!  Holy crap, where did summer go?  I mean, I still have, like, 25 days before I return to school, but seriously.  Time...AHH!  So it's now been about a week at home, and I haven't died yet, which I suppose is a good thing.  Instead of being whiney like usual, I think I will list the top 10 reasons why home is good:

10. Getting to sleep in...after 11 weeks of getting up wicked early, it is so great to sleep in past 7:30!
9. My queen-sized bed.
8. Driving my car. I missed it.
7. Shopping with my mom.
6. Home-cooked meals.
5. Teaching at my old studio ($$)
4. My YMCA membership and favorite yoga studio.
3. My church.
2. Pets-2 dogs, 2 cats, and a turtle. Not bad company.
1. Family-When we're not fighting, they are lovely...really.

I'm hoping to go into Chicago a lot this week to take class.  A week off is plenty and I need to remain in the shape I was in upon leaving Orlando.  I'm also hoping to meet up with some friends there as well, so hopefully, at least some of my boredom will be relieved.

I still miss everyone from everywhere more than you know.  I'm also really worried about finances at the moment, for the audition season is looming (well, Jan-April, but still) and I'm trying to wrap my mind around how much my family and I are going to have to fork out for flights and hotel reservations and postage for audition packets and video and blah blah blah...AHHHH!  Trying not to freak out.  And also praying for a miracle that will help me make do all the things I want to do next summer, including LeakyCon.  Stay tuned.

Before I go, I wanted to briefly mention that I saw Inception last night and loved it.  I'm still not convinced one way or the other of the end, but regardless of plot (which was awesome), the film-making involved was just epic and amazing.  Also, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Marion Cotillard <3.  I love movies that make you think, and I think I'm going to have to agree with the critics who applauded it.  Other movies on my list still to see this summer are Charlie St. Cloud and Despicable Me.  I'm really pumped for Mao's Last Dancer, as well.
 
I'm feelin' good about this whole BEDA thing.  Keep up with me.  If you'd like to follow me on twitter, you can click here.  I also have a tumblr in case anyone's interested...mostly I just reblog photos and quotes and things other users post.  Here is where I do the "serious" blogging.  Happy August!  Rabbit, rabbit.  Love ya'll <3

I have a blog? Oh...right...whoops...

Hello there, old friends.  Or new friends.  Or people who read this.  Which is probably no one, but that's fine.  I'm sitting up in bed way, way, way past my bedtime and remembered that I used to use this.  But then I forgot about it.  And didn't have anything to write about.  So I stopped.  As usually happens with me...and then I don't do something for so long that I feel weird going back to it, etc., etc., you get the gist.  Whatever.

Anywho....I guess I'm writing now because I can't sleep and have nothing better to do and I've been home for a total of 5 days and I'm already completely stir crazy and cabin fever ridden and dying.  O hai, run-on sentence.  You're awesome.

Let's see...where to begin?  After spending 6 weeks at IU for summer session I and the next 5 in Orlando, Florida as an RA for Orlando Ballet School's summer intensive, home is a complete and utter bore.  I'm restless and I miss everyone and I feel old and I'm just generally frustrated.  You see, I haven't spent much time at home since I went away to high school at 14, so, naturally I don't really have a life here.  Yes, my family's here and yes, I love them, but there's only so much togetherness I can take before I start going nuts.  And to make matters worse this time around, I'm 22 and the few friends I did have who still live here are now graduated from college and beginning their lives elsewhere.  Which is great for them.  But no so much for me.

Also, everyone I met in Orlando is truly, truly amazing, and I miss everyone and it sucks.  And I also got to go hang out at Infinitus for a few hours and see some awesome people, which was awesome, but then sad because I had to leave them.

So, basically right now I just feel like I'm in a kind of limbo...waiting for something to happen...anything to happen, while I figure out how I'm going to survive northwest Indiana for the next 3 1/2 weeks.  Any suggestions?

Sorry this was rambly and whiney...I'll have a real update about what I've been doing with my life for the past 4 months very soon (hopefully).  Okloveyoubye.

Mississin' Mississippi

Today was the first day back at school after spring break, as well as the first day of tech week for spring ballet...we're performing on Friday (yikes!).  It was a bit rough getting out of bed this morning and getting back to the grind, but I am so unbelievably happy right now.

Last week, I went down to Biloxi, Mississippi with a group on campus called Y'ALL (Youth Advocating Leadership and Learning).  There were approximately 60 of us and we skipped the whole "Frat Lauderdale" thing in favor of staying in a church on bunk beds and working on several different housing projects in and around Biloxi.  I could not be more thrilled with how the week went.  I'd been wanting to do an alternative spring break for quite some time, and I am SO happy that I decided to do it. 

Breakdown of the week:
We left on a charter bus from Bloomington at 2 am Saturday night/Sunday morning.  It was a bit of a long trip, but at least we left in the middle of the night so I slept a lot of the way, though sleeping on charter buses is not the easiest feet, especially when you're 5'9".  When we arrived Sunday afternoon to Biloxi Christian Church, where we stayed, most of us dropped our stuff in our new living quarters and promptly went outside to enjoy the gorgeous coastal sunshine and throw a frisbee around.  I played what I think was my first game of Ultimate (by the way, I'm TERRIBLEEE).  We also played the largest, most epic game of Catch Phrase I've ever seen.  So much fun :)

 
We were all split up into groups of about 7 or 8, each with a group leader.  I fell in love with my group because everyone was just awesome.  Anyhow, our group was assigned to Gautier, MS on Monday, where we basically worked on picking up litter.  This didn't thrill us too much at the beginning because, after all, it was something we could have been doing in Bloomington...we didn't have to ride a bus for 13 hours to do it, but as the day went on, my group bonded more and more and we realized how poverty-stricken and desperate the city of Gautier is.  They simply don't have the means to clean up all the trash there is and rely on volunteers like us to do the honors.  Perhaps not the most glamorous or fulfilling day of the trip, but ok nonetheless.  We returned to camp and had dinner and ended the night with a bonfire, s'mores, and ghost stories.  Straight up summer camp.  Fabulous.

Tuesday, my group stayed at camp and worked on clearing tons of brush and ripping siding off one of the bunkhouses.  The camp was created and is maintained by volunteers, so it is up to groups like us to do this kind of work.  Tearing siding is HARD work.  My back was soooo beyond sore the next day, but it was so much fun.  It was especially awesome to see our faculty advisor, Conner, tear absolutely gigantic pieces of siding off the bunk house by himself with no help from anyone else.  Beast.  That evening was spent playing never-ending games of spoons and Apples to Apples.
Wednesday was probably my favorite day of the trip.  We had a half day of work and went to what is called the Project Houses.  We did a ton of interior painting and sanding.  Then, we got picked up and taken back to Gautier, where all 60 of us IU kids were served up a good old fashioned Mississippi Shrimp Boil.  One word: AH-MAAY-ZING.  Best jambalaya I've ever had.  Literally.  Then, we took a tour of Biloxi, which is still in need of so much help.  It was definitely an eerie sight to see pylons where a bridge used to be (in some places there are still pieces of road in the water) and driveways and walkways that led to nowhere.  It definitely put everything in perspective.  A woman spoke to us about her Katrina experience, and it was just heartwrenching.  She and her husband rebuilt their house just feet from where their old one was essentially blown away.  Imagine losing everything.  That's what happened to almost everyone in Biloxi.  People don't realize this, but Katrina hit New Orleans at a Category 1, but Biloxi at a Category 5.  The only reason N.O. got so much more press was because the levees broke.  Now, don't get me wrong, that was horrific and terrible and awful, but people don't understand that Katrina basically killed the city of Biloxi.  There is so much rebuilding still left to do it's unreal.  But enough with the depressing stuff.  We topped off the day with a visit to the beach, and, while it wasn't as warm as we'd have liked it to be, it was still great to be able to stick our feet in the Gulf. 

Thursday, we went back to the Project Houses and did A LOT of exterior painting.  I was up on 18 foot scaffolding (terrifying, btw) painting window sills and conquering fears.  It was pretty fabulous.  We were such efficient workers that we had about a half hour to kill before we got picked back up.  We then had dinner, some last minute down time, cleaning, a final meeting, and then got on the bus around 9 and headed back to Btown.  We arrived around lunch time Friday morning and I spent the remainder of the weekend hanging out at one of my new friend's houses with  a couple other people I met on the trip.

Everyone on the trip was so unbelievably wonderful.  I can't even tell you in words how awesome it was to have a break from the normal college greek life grind.  I feel really rested and definitely ready to tackle the rest of tech week.  I know God is doing something truly great in my life right now, and I honestly cannot wait to find out where He takes me next.  I'm so grateful for Y'ALL and all who went on the trip and for the welcoming people of Mississippi, without whom, we wouldn't have had a place to stay (or as many funny stories as we did). 

If you are even considering an alternative spring break, DO IT!  Seriously, you won't regret it.  I'm hoping I'll be able to do the Y'ALL summer trip, but it all depends on my summer school schedule.  Crossin' my fingers though!  Hope your springs are off to a lovely start.  I'm so excited to perform this weekend.  Serenade, here we go!!

Countdown to Spring Break

Over the last two weeks, it has gone to beyond freezing to nearly 50 degrees...today I woke up and the sun was out :) That's about the only really good news I have to report.  The last couple of weeks have been a blur of lack of rehearsal for Serenade (the most we've had was an hour and a half on Tuesday), nearly passing out in my voice lesson this past week (yes, really), studying my ass off for midterms (thank God they're over), and occasionally going out in between.  Soooo ready for spring break.

I'm currently praying for peace and clarity and to stop worrying and over-analyzing.  I don't care to go into the details, but I struggle all the time with trying to analyze and re-analyze all the time and blaming myself when things don't work out.  I fault myself all. the. time.  And it's stupid and unnecessary, but I do it, and I don't know how to stop.  I think it is because I grew up in ballet--constantly in front of a mirror, being told what's wrong, what to correct, nutrition seminar after nutrition seminar, and always being told you're not good enough.  I need to stop blaming myself or thinking that it's something I did wrong...because I know it's not...but my brain refuses to acknowledge that.  Anyway, enough depressingness...

This year for spring break, I'll be taking a bus down to Biloxi, Mississippi with a campus organization called Y'ALL (Youth Advocating Leadership and Learning) to build houses and reach out to the still ravaged gulf coast.  I originally wanted to go with Habitat, but by the time I got my stuff together, all their trips were filled up.  I've been dying to go on an Alternative Spring Break since I found out what they were a few years ago.  Now, I'll admit that going to Mississippi isn't as cool as going to some place like Costa Rica or Africa (though I'm hoping to get there eventually), but I'm so pumped.  I was given a desire to serve, and I couldn't be more excited.  The only scary thing is that I know absolutely NO ONE.  Not a soul.  I know it will be great, but the uneasiness of not even having one single familiar face with you is a bit nerve-wracking.  But I'm pumped.  We leave Sunday the 14th.

I want to go shopping.  I haven't been hardcore shopping since Christmas break, and I feel like it's definitely time for a day at Nordstrom and Bloomingdale's with good friends and a credit card.  Hello, compulsive retail therapy.

In order to fill the void that has been left in my heart since the Olympics ended (beyond depressed that Bob Costas no longer dominates my television), I've been watching too much trashy television.  My friend Becca got me hooked on The Real Housewives (Orange County and NYC), and I'm ashamed to say I'm a little addicted.  These women are ridiculous and act like they're stuck in high school.  Hilarious.  I'm also obsessed with GREEK and Make It or Break It.  I know, right?  But seriously, GREEK is soooo entertaining and it's hilarious to see aspects of my school's greek system, while exaggerated, played out on TV.  And Make It or Break It is kind of like art-imitating-life for me.  I mean, I know I'm not headed for London 2012 (it can't come soon enough by the way), but the things the gymnasts go through are very similar to what I've experienced as a dancer--pressure to be perfect, lack of friends outside the studio/gym, etc.  I mean, of course it's horribly melodramatic and way overdone, but I love it nonetheless.  Also, I'm so glad The Bachelor is over so I can have my Monday night back.  Dear Jake, I'm pretty sure you picked Vienna for lust, but whatever.  You'll regret it in about a year when she's still acting like she's 20 and you're almost in your mid-30s.  Love, Ellen

That's enough for now...hopefully I'll be updating this thing more regularly...it's been a while, but I've been swamped. 

Starting to come together

So, I promised ya'll a fully detailed review of the wedding...here it goes...

I arrived home on Friday (the 12th) and went straight to the church for the rehearsal, which went off basically without a hitch (save for me trying to pretend it was my wedding and obsessing over every detail--oops!).  Said hi to my aunt and uncle, who I never get to see so that was exciting.  Then, we went back home for pizza, the closest thing to a rehearsal dinner a 2nd wedding will get.  The evening was concluded by my mom and I going to spend the night at my grandma's house, staying up to watch the Olympic opening ceremonies (I've been obsessed with Vancouver for the last week and a half, by the way), and then heading to bed. 

In the morning, Mom and I got up, went to my favorite boutique in town to have my dress steamed at the last minute (my mom used to work there), and then went to our hair salon to have our hair done.  It was a girly morning and I loved every minute of it.  Plus, my mom gave me a card that was seriously the sweetest thing I've ever read and reduced me to tears at 11 am...I should've known I'd be in trouble right then (luckily, there is such a thing as waterproof mascara).

And then we headed to the church, doing all the standard getting ready, taking pictures stuff (without seeing the groom, of course) and then it was time.  I was an absolute wreck throughout most of the ceremony.  When my mom walked down the aisle and I caught sight of Dave's face and hers, I lost it completely.  I bawled when my brother read from 1 Corinthians and when they exchanged vows.  Pretty sure I cried more than my mom.  It was just so emotional for me, for many reasons which are far too personal for a blog post, but all I can say is I'd never seen my mom look that beautiful or that happy.  It was truly spectacular. 

The reception was an absolute blast!!  My dad's brother's family was there, as was his step-sister's family.  Each has 3 kids and they are my brother's and my favorites and we rarely get to see each other so it was just great that they could be there.  If there's anything I've learned, it's that family is not just who you're related to by blood...it's who you love.  The power of love is always so potent at weddings.  I need to remember it all the time. 

Highlights/Results of the open bar:
1. The full-on dance-off between my cousin Grace (modern dancer), my cousin Iris (former Irish Step Dancer), and myself (obviously the ballerina).  It was epic.
2. When my now step-brother's friend asked me to dance (nothing ever going to happen there, trust me) and I said yes...hahahah
3. My brother wouldn't dance with me, so I asked his dweebtastic friend Drew to dance.  It was as awkward as it sounds lol.
4. My mom and Dave's first dance...it was gorgeous.
5. Just looking at my mom's smile.  Pretty sure it's never been that big or that beautiful before.

The night concluded at my cousins' house in drunken stupor.  Hadn't laughed that hard in a while and I think we finished 4 pizzas.  My uncle was a hot mess and it was the funniest thing ever.

The next morning, I sent my mom off on her honeymoon cruise (JEALOUS) and returned to school, unfortunately Valentineless, but it was ok.  I had experienced so much love during that weekend that I didn't care.  Can you believe it?  Perpetually single, cynical me didn't care that I didn't have a Valentine.  It was liberating and awesome.  I just felt like I had experienced this insane high all weekend and I'm still so happy.  It was amazing and I'm so glad I got to share it with my family.

Since then, I've been swamped by school, underwhelmed by ballet (haven't gotten to do a whole lot of rehearsal and wasn't cast in 2 of the 3 ballets for spring show, but it's ok), and focusing on eliminating negative energy from my life and still trying to let go because it is Lent after all. 

Spring Break is in a little over 2 weeks and I'm going to Biloxi to build houses and I couldn't be more excited.  I don't know anyone going, so I'm looking forward to getting to know some new people and hopefully making some new friends. 

On one last note, my friends are awesome.  Like, seriously.  Amazing.  I don't deserve them...they put up with so much of my melodrama and have the odd knack to calm/talk me down.  My neuroses is sometimes not easy to deal with, and they seem not to care.  So grateful.  Also, my mom is an incredible woman.  She deserves every bit of the happiness she is experiencing right now.  So happy for her.  And for our family.  Life is good right now, I think.  There are some things I'm overthinking, but I'm trying not to let them get to me.  The Lord says "Do not worry about anything" so I'm going to continue to attempt to let go of my fear and anxiety.  Your prayers are still needed.

Just remembered Mom is coming this weekend for DG mom's weekend!!  Pumped :)  Think that's it for now.  Almost Fridayyy!